Issue No. 53

Do you remember when you were once sick and you searched the symptoms online? The result said you were going to die in 3 days or something exaggerated like that, but it turned out to be nothing at all. Yet, you kept digging and digging into it, finding more anxiety-inducing results. Or what about that time when you searched for red flags that your boyfriend might have? You read several blogs, Reddit posts, confirming a lot of his behavior. After that, you started developing contempt for him, which led to your breakup. And what about that time when you kept watching news about how the Earth's climate is changing rapidly? You saw several videos of polar ice caps melting, migration of animals, floods, and deforestation leading you to believe that we’re all doomed and there is no more hope for us.

The brain is a complicated organ, but it is predictable. We have developed an entire science to predict what one person would most likely do in specific situations: cognitive science, which includes the combination of psychology, linguistics, computer science, anthropology, philosophy, and neuroscience. But in addition to that, we have also figured out how beliefs are developed and influenced. It turns out our brains naturally seek to conserve cognitive resources by taking mental shortcuts, ultimately limiting the belief system to a few. We select which information supports our current strong beliefs in order to strengthen it further or confirm our suspicions. This is a cognitive trait called confirmation bias—the tendency of people to search for, interpret, favor, and recall information in a way that confirms or supports their preexisting beliefs, hypotheses, or expectations while disregarding or downplaying contradictory evidence. In other words, we tend to seek out information that aligns with our existing views and to ignore or rationalize information that contradicts them.

So, what do you think happens when you keep watching negative news? You will see only negative things in the world. When you keep searching for red flags that your partner might have, you will see only red flags. When you keep searching for the possible causes of your symptoms, you will find only the ones that support it, disregarding the entire picture. When you only seek negativity, it will be the only thing you see. If it’s the only thing you see, it’s the only thing you can project and offer to the world. If it’s the only thing you can offer to the world, guess what, no good thing will come to your doors.

This is a very dangerous cognitive trait because it can lead to a rabbit hole that you cannot escape from because you don't know it exists in the first place. You just keep digging and digging. What if we can use confirmation bias to live a good life? What if, instead of looking for the negative and confirming negative perceptions, we actually seek the opposite?

Instead of looking for reasons why the world is a cruel place, you start thinking only about what makes it beautiful. Instead of thinking why your partner can have so many red flags, think about the beautiful things he has done for you. People are different. They have flaws. I know it's not an excuse for mediocrity, but no one is born with all good traits already set in them. You have flaws too. The important thing is you are working on them. Go out and see the world in a better light. Look for what makes it good, what makes it beautiful, what makes it nice. Perhaps it's the food you have on your plate, the clean air you breathe, the caressing hug of your loved ones, the compliments you receive on social media, or the job that pays your bills. So many people would probably die for what you have right now. We naturally want more, but it's no excuse to not see what we have at the moment.

Does this mean you should just forget about the negative things happening in the world, or the uncomfortable behaviors your partner exhibits, or how your boss treats you? Of course not. What this new view teaches you is to never seek them out. When they arise, welcome them, but don't actively seek trouble or negativity.

When you shift your perception of the world like this, confirmation bias transforms into something more profound: the law of attraction. The law of attraction is a universal principle that posits positive thoughts and actions lead to positive outcomes, while negative ones lead to negative outcomes. I guarantee you, your life will be much better when you start focusing on the positive. Every day, you'll be grateful to be alive. As this happens, you radiate positivity back into the world. You become kinder, more empathetic, more humble, and more engaging. The result of this positive thinking manifests in the form of opportunities, often leading to further positivity in your life. Do you see how this shift in perspective transforms what seemed like a dreadful path into something desirable?

This principle applies to many aspects of life. For instance, if you're pursuing a long-term goal like building your own business or company, your mind might start to doubt whether you can achieve it. Perhaps you think you lack capital or skills. When you catch yourself thinking like that even before taking action, pause, and redirect your focus towards imagining what it would be like to actually achieve it, then begin working towards it. Don’t pre-judge your abilities before giving it a try. Sometimes, we discover new things about ourselves as we pursue something entirely new.

So, starting tomorrow, change your perspective. Alter the way you think. Seek out positivity. When negativity arrives and comes knocking at your door, welcome it, but don't let it stay for long. Train your mind to do this consistently, and you'll discover how easy it is to shape your thoughts, and eventually your life, for the better.

🗣️ Let your friends join us in this journey by telling them to sign up for Sunday Stillness newsletter here: aceapolonio.com

📖 Read the past issues here: Link

📨 Leave a message for me here.


Until next week,